Bittersweet Goodbye
by Danym
Summary: Sara leaves the lab with Grissom right behind her. [GSR, AU]


Bittersweet Goodbye

By Dany

Rating: K+

Summary: Sara leaves the lab with Grissom right behind her. GSR, AU

A/N: There are lots of rumors about the contracts for the next season. This is my version (well, one of them) of the end, but I sure hope it doesn't turn out that way for real.

Disclaimer: I don't own CSI.

xxxxx

It was obvious that all of them were shocked when Sara announced she was leaving that day, after shift ended.

However, her departure from the Las Vegas Crime Lab was all but sudden for her. She'd planned this for weeks, knowing that she'd had no other choice.

She didn't want there to be a big ruckus, but hadn't had the heart to leave without saying anything at all. That's why she had waited until the last day.

The only one who appeared unaffected was Grissom.

His face betrayed nothing, but he had been warned in advance. He had signed the paperwork, accepting her two weeks notice.

"Why?" Nick looked like he was about to cry when he asked her.

It hurt her, but she knew it was necessary. "No personal stuff at work;" that's what the sheriff had said. She had to remind herself of that and stay calm.

"It's time." She couldn't say more, fearing she would break down and tell them everything, and that was against the deal.

The deal… it would be hard to start over, but it was for the best. At least, that's what she kept telling herself.

The others didn't look satisfied with her answer, but apparently sensed that that was the only answer they would get.

Uncomfortable silence threatened to overwhelm them all, but thankfully Grissom broke it to hand out the cases of the night.

Sara was with him.

She was glad to be with someone who wouldn't ask questions and that it was Grissom she would be working with on her last night. The sadness at not working with all of them, however, was weighing her down.

"It will be alright." His voice soothed her, making her feel not quite so alone.

"I wish we could have done this differently." She looked out the window as he drove, trying to sort her thoughts out before they arrived at the crime scene.

No matter how difficult it was for her right now, she needed to be focused when the real work began.

"Me too. But it won't be forever."

"It won't be forever," she repeated, trying to feel more confident that everything would fall in its place.

xxxxx

Two weeks later, she was sitting on packed bags – literally – waiting for Grissom.

Tonight had been _his_ last shift and he intended to make good on his promise not to say goodbye. He would have left work by now and no one would have noticed that he would not be back. He was ready to follow her.

They had both been sad to go, but the sheriff hadn't left them any other choice. They had told him of her unexpected but not unwanted pregnancy a couple of weeks earlier, and it had turned out to be a disaster. He hadn't yelled or fired them on the spot, but he had given them a lecture about work ethics. He had laid down the rules and wouldn't stop talking about the effect this could have on their careers.

They had tried to argue with him that what they did at home didn't affect their work, but had to concede that no matter how good they seemed to be at separating the two worlds, it was against the regulations. Grissom was her supervisor. If word got out, there would be consequences.

Once the sheriff had made that clear, he suddenly switched gears and told them that he didn't want to ruin their careers because he valued their work. Following that statement, he started to discuss several approaches to their problem with them.

In the end, there had only been one viable option: they would both leave and start over new somewhere they wouldn't work together as supervisor and subordinate.

The sheriff had offered to help them, but they had both declined, although they accepted his help in protecting their reputation.

It wasn't really that bad from a professional view, both knowing that they wouldn't be unemployed for long, but personally, it was a disaster.

Sara had gotten an offer that would be accommodating of her future as mother, and while Grissom had gotten lots of offers from other labs, he had declined all of them. He would go with Sara. She took the position at the crime lab on the East Coast and it didn't take long for him to find a teaching position in the same area.

The arrangement was perfect, but it didn't make it any easier to leave.

Sara would be able to pursue her career and in turn, Grissom would have a more relaxed schedule, removed from the tiring work of a CSI. When the baby arrived, his job would be flexible enough to allow him to take care of everything.

They wished they could have had the same offer in Las Vegas, but the sheriff was right on one account: here, Grissom would always be the supervisor and Sara the subordinate, no matter what they did. Away from all of that, Sara didn't have to fear for her reputation.

In theory, they had been prepared for that possible outcome, but the reality was something quite different. They weren't prepared for the myriad of feelings that accompanied their departure.

They had to leave their family behind, and the hardest thing was that they couldn't tell them anything. That was the deal they had with the sheriff.

Sara avoided answering phone calls from her old team, leaving them to believe that she had already left town.

After tonight, that wouldn't be an excuse anymore. As soon as Grissom was home, they were going to pack everything into his car and leave. Everything else would be too hard.

Sara heard the lock turn and looked up to see Grissom enter. What she saw there shocked her. He didn't look so confident anymore. In fact, he looked torn and sad. She knew what was wrong without him even having to say a word.

Grissom had always tried to convince himself that he could just walk away – hence the "ghost" comment to Warrick. He really wanted to believe that he wasn't that attached because then it wouldn't hurt so much. But now, reality had caught up with him.

He was not as isolated from everyone else as he would have liked to believe. They had become his friends and he was comfortable with the ways things were. He would miss them as much as she would.

Sara opened her arms and Grissom went willingly, pulling her close. He wouldn't cry, but she knew it hit him hard.

This was really a goodbye and it would be a while before either of them would be able to accept the break that had to be.

xxxxx

The transition hadn't been easy, but she'd managed.

Her colleagues seemed nice enough and it was nothing like her start in Vegas. Of course, the circumstances had been different, and she wouldn't want to do that again, but in the end, she had found a home there.

Here, everything was different. She was working days now. While it matched Grissom's schedule, it was hard on her sleeping habits.

Another change was that everyone knew she was pregnant. The lab had been aware of that fact from the beginning, but they had been willing to give her a chance.

Until the baby was born, she was on probation, doing mostly lab work. This gave her a chance to adjust without hurry.

When she was back from her maternity leave, she would hopefully be able to dive in right away and show her full potential.

Her reputation as a dedicated and hard worker had made this leniency possible and she was grateful for the chance.

Grissom had also started at his new job, teaching coming easier to him than he had thought. He didn't miss the gruesome work as a CSI, but he did miss some things that came with it: working with Sara and his team, working nights and his old home.

It wasn't that he was miserable, but having to leave his life of the past twenty years behind had been very hard.

As a result, they both clung to each other and the thought of their baby to combat the homesickness they felt.

Their new schedule left them with enough time to do things they hadn't done in years. A quiet evening at home without having to think about work had been very rare, but now they found the time for it almost daily. The new start had also helped them as a couple – as a family.

Sara wriggled a little on the couch, snuggling deeper into Grissom's chest.

"Do you still miss them?" she asked, although she already knew the answer. It was just a way to start talking about home and to seek confirmation that she wasn't alone with her feelings.

"Every day," was his simple answer.

xxxxx

Sara didn't feel well. Nearing the end of her pregnancy, she felt tired all the time and some muscles or joints were always aching, but it wasn't that alone.

Even after four months, she still missed Brass, Nick, Greg, Warrick…everyone. She got along well with her new colleagues, but it wasn't the same.

They had started talking to them again soon after they had arrived here, but they still hadn't told anyone about the baby. They hadn't even told them that they were together because they didn't know how.

If they wanted the others to understand, they would have to tell them about the whole deal. Sara, at least, was too scared of their reaction and needed to work up some more courage to come clean.

Tiredly, she pushed the door to her home open, struggling with her backpack and a grocery bag, but she managed to keep the bag from falling. "Griss?"

He came to her aid immediately and took her baggage from her. "Anything for the fridge?"

When she shook her head, he put the bags next to the door and helped her out of her coat before pulling her along.

"I know you don't like surprises and you didn't want a baby shower, but there are some people who would like to see you and celebrate with us."

Sara almost turned to walk away, not knowing what to expect, but the hopeful expression on Grissom's face made her follow him.

They entered the living room, Grissom's wide frame blocking her view of the couch. The moment he stepped aside, she thought her heart would stop beating.

Brass, Nick and Greg sat on the couch, smiling at her.

Brass was the first to make a move, getting up to pull her into his arms. Sara was overwhelmed by everything and it took her a while to recover and hug back.

"I'm so happy for you," Brass whispered in her ear, not wanting the others to hear that he had become soft.

She would later blame it all on hormones, but she knew that wasn't the real reason when she started to cry and hug Brass harder. All of the worries were suddenly too much for her and she let go.

She soon felt a hand between her shoulder blades, soothing her. Grissom had moved closer because he couldn't stand by while Sara was crying.

Slowly pulling back from Brass, Sara turned and threw herself into Grissom's arms. "Thank you."

She pulled him down for a quick kiss before she turned to Nick and Greg, also enveloping them in a hug. Such a behavior was quite shocking for her, but she had missed them and felt bad for making them believe that she had left because she wanted to.

It took a while before she calmed down enough to answer their questions, but then they talked for hours. She was glad that she didn't have to hide anymore and could see their friends again. It was sad that Catherine and Warrick hadn't been able to come as well, but someone had to hold down the fort. They sent their congratulations through the others and hoped that they could all get together sometime soon.

This evening was the best present Grissom could have gotten for her and their baby and she would be forever grateful that he had made the first move.

This was family, no matter how many miles lay between them.

xxxxx

Sara uploaded the photo into her email account, smiling at the thought of the stunned faces the others would have once they'd seen it.

A soft chime told her that the upload had been successful and she quickly typed in the title of the mail: "Happy Thanksgiving – CSI Style".

As text she simply wrote: "Ava Grissom, November 22nd, 2007".

The end


End file.
